As a nightclub owner, I hired a pianist and a drummer to entertain my customers.

After several performances, I discovered the drummer had walked away with some of my valuables.

I notified police, who arrested him. Desperate for another drummer, I called a friend who knew some musicians. "What happened to the drummer you had?" he asked me. "I had him arrested, " I replied.

We said good-bye and hung up. A few minutes later my friend called back and asked, "How badly did he play?"