1 If you are 34 and single, nobody notices. 2 Everything on your face stays its original colour. 3 Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

4 Car mechanics tell you the truth.

5 Same work...

more pay.

6 Gray hair and wrinkles only add character. 7 Wedding dress -- 2, 000. Tuxedo rental -- 75 bucks. 8 Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 9 A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. 10 You can open all your own jars. 11 You don't have to learn to spell a new last name.

12 You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. 13 Wedding plans take care of themselves. 14 If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be friends. 15 If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.

16 You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours. 17 You almost never have strap problems in public. 18 You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. 19 The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. 20 One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.

21 Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.