Bessie had a new dime to invest in an ice cream soda. "Why don't you give your dime to the missions?" said the minister, who was calling at her home. "I thought about that, " said Bessie, "but I think I'll buy the ice cream and let the druggist give it to the missions.

" A newly married man asks his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?" "Darling, " the woman replies sweetly, "I'd have married you no matter who left you a fortune." Thought for the Day A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

Today's Quickie At a family gathering, a stack of apples had a sign: "Take only one -God is watching." Nearby, someone had put a sign near a pile of cookies: "Take all you want - God is watching the apples." Just Wondering If a 911 operator has a heart attack, who do they call?